To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.
I doubt any of us wake up every morning praying for our success and failure for everyone around us. This is not what this line is trying to say. I know that we mothers of angels would never wish this pain, this loss, or this heartache on any woman. However I think we all at one point may have been guilty of seeing another pregnant woman or a brand new baby and not wishing our pain on them, but wondering what makes them so different? why does she get to buy diapers and wipes for the baby she is carrying and why am I buying a casket or an urn? Although we don't wish sickness or anything bad on them, are we really enthusiastic about their success? Did we stop to think there may be a story behind that woman with the newborn or the woman shopping for her new baby? Is it possible that she could have walked the same painful journey before getting to the place she is now?
What about when others success hits close to home? When our friends, or family calls you with the exciting news of being pregnant? That's a hard thing to take it, here you just loss your baby and your sister in law is having a healthy set of twins, you love her, but you wonder "how on earth am I going to help plan her baby shower?"
This line isn't about you not being happy for these women and these healthy babies. I think we all agree that no woman should feel this pain, this line is about truly being just as enthusiastic when it comes to others as YOU would want them to be when you share your positive news. It is to remind you that everyone has great moments in their lives as well as bad moments. It's to give us a humbling line of hope that says, "Life's whether is bad right now, but I will see the summer months again, winters can be long, but they are never forever"
How did this line effect me? I recall finding out that a very close friend of mine was pregnant with her 3rd child, it was surprising news because for a moment I thought out of all the girls in our group she and I were content where we were with kids and we would be the only two not TTC. I was not supposed to find out the way I did or how I did, it was a total shock. As much as I was happy for her, I remember going into the bathroom to break down and cry. I don't know if I was upset that she didn't tell me, I don't know if I was upset that she was pregnant, I don't know if it was just because my hormones were still out of wack. All I know is that I was not as enthusiastic about her pregnancy as I should have been. I will always feel bad about that.
See you next week To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the great achievements of the future
3 comments:
Deep in my heart I am jealous of all moms who have or have had healthy babies..I do not wish them any ill but I do wish that I had the same luck as they do. I definitely wish my son was smiling his toothless smile at me right now.
I too have let the jealous monster rear its ugly head when I see a pregnant woman or a newborn baby. Thanks for putting it in perspective. Maybe one day I too will be as lucky to get a rainbow...
I've definitely been very happy for my friends and family when they find out they're pregnant or have a baby. For me, it's seeing strangers that are the hardest. Not sure why but I find it hard to look and them so I make sure my eyes avoid them. It's true that we don't know what they've been through and they might be just like us and have experienced a loss and now have that hope of holding a baby again.
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