Week 9 of The Secret

To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.

This one is by far the hardest I have come across in this pathway to becoming a better person. It's also one of the most important to achieve. I have to convict myself often for criticizing someone for their choices or actions. The sad part is I do not criticize those who I don't know, I only do it to the people that I know, because I feel they can do better. This is something that I constantly and will continue to work on, because it's not right and as the old saying goes, "if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all"

Because this line is a little harder for me than the others I'm going to do a test on myself also. I'm going to think before I speak, I'm going to avoid confrontation as best as I can, and when I get that itch to say something mean, I'm going to take the high road and remind myself that if I'm criticizing a person, I'm doing something to them that I wouldn't want done to me.

No excuses this time, and it's true the hardest thing to do, is to do nothing at all.


See you next week: To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

Week 8 of The Secret

To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet


Think about being at Sam's Club, and you have two people giving out samples. One of the employee's has a cheerful smile on their face while the other looks like they just may have spit in your food. Just their demeanor can make that sample less appealing to you. The best phone conversation I've had was with a customer service rep at Sprint. We got our cell phone bill and it's was about $200.00 over normal price. My husband got on the phone and spit fire at the representative then hung up in his face. We were both upset about the bill but I called back because I wanted to get more info on the charges so I called the rep back. I began by apologizing for my husbands behavior but the rep was clearly already upset and I could tell by the tone of his voice. He was giving my attitude I should have given it right back to him, but I didn't I continued to talk to him with a calm voice as we went through each charge on the bill. By mid conversation his voice perked up and he began laughing and joking with me. At the end of our 15 min conversation I was able to find out that the charges on our bill were valid, but he was able to extend a huge credit that we were eligible for but never realized it. I try to remind myself of this story when I want to walk around in public with a "kill the world look on my face".

Morale of the story, being kind pays off. Next time you see a new baby or a pregnant woman in a store, give her smile. It's easier to do that, than continue your shopping being jealous of them.

See you next week: To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.

Week 7 of The Secret

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the great achievements of the future


First I'd like to thank all who follow The Secret breakdown, whether you do it on your blog or not. I have enjoyed testing myself to become a better person.

This weeks line was hard for me, I rarely dwell in the mistakes of the past, if I make a mistake, I make it right and I move on from it. From all the mistakes I've made there is one that I often still think about. I suppose because the situation finally hit home for me.
Back when I was newly pregnant with Vayden, my dear friend Sheena suffered an ectopic pregnancy loss. She didn't even know she was pregnant until she found out she was going to lose her baby. She and her husband had been TTC for months. When I heard the news I sobbed on my couch, I was pregnant and wanted to be pregnant just as bad as she did. I was even a lil upset with God, if any of you know Sheena, she not only wanted another child, she truly deserved another child. Amazing mother!!!!

Because she knew that I was pregnant and we were supposed to be "belly buddies" I thought it would be too hard for her to be around me, I didn't even call her. I sent her a msg on myspace telling her how sorry I was for her loss. When I found out about Vayden's condition, Sheena was the 1st out of my friends that I called. I cried and screamed on the phone with her, she cried with me, she talked to me for about 2 hrs as I repeated myself over and over again. She was there for me every step of the way through my journey of carrying to term. She even spoke at Vayden's memorial services. Sheena thank you for treating me, better than I treated you.

My most regretted mistake was that I wasn't there for her during her loss like she was for me. I will never again assume that a woman doesn't want or need support after her loss. I will lend my ear and offer my shoulder, and I will now be able to say " I understand"

See you next week: To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet

MVOA in the media

I filmed a segment for the local news in Oklahoma City a few weeks ago, to share a lil of Vayden's story and info on My Very Own Angel. I wanted to share that feed with all my wonderful amazing followers. Click this link to view the video http://www.news9.com/Global/category.asp?C=116601&autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=4118072&flvUri=&thirdpartymrssurl=

If you are having trouble with the link you can also go to www.news9.com find the Making a Difference, my segment is titles Very Own Angel Bears

Also if you type Very Own Angel Bears into google search engine it will be #1.

The Secret Week 6

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

I doubt any of us wake up every morning praying for our success and failure for everyone around us. This is not what this line is trying to say. I know that we mothers of angels would never wish this pain, this loss, or this heartache on any woman. However I think we all at one point may have been guilty of seeing another pregnant woman or a brand new baby and not wishing our pain on them, but wondering what makes them so different? why does she get to buy diapers and wipes for the baby she is carrying and why am I buying a casket or an urn? Although we don't wish sickness or anything bad on them, are we really enthusiastic about their success? Did we stop to think there may be a story behind that woman with the newborn or the woman shopping for her new baby? Is it possible that she could have walked the same painful journey before getting to the place she is now?

What about when others success hits close to home? When our friends, or family calls you with the exciting news of being pregnant? That's a hard thing to take it, here you just loss your baby and your sister in law is having a healthy set of twins, you love her, but you wonder "how on earth am I going to help plan her baby shower?"
This line isn't about you not being happy for these women and these healthy babies. I think we all agree that no woman should feel this pain, this line is about truly being just as enthusiastic when it comes to others as YOU would want them to be when you share your positive news. It is to remind you that everyone has great moments in their lives as well as bad moments. It's to give us a humbling line of hope that says, "Life's whether is bad right now, but I will see the summer months again, winters can be long, but they are never forever"

How did this line effect me? I recall finding out that a very close friend of mine was pregnant with her 3rd child, it was surprising news because for a moment I thought out of all the girls in our group she and I were content where we were with kids and we would be the only two not TTC. I was not supposed to find out the way I did or how I did, it was a total shock. As much as I was happy for her, I remember going into the bathroom to break down and cry. I don't know if I was upset that she didn't tell me, I don't know if I was upset that she was pregnant, I don't know if it was just because my hormones were still out of wack. All I know is that I was not as enthusiastic about her pregnancy as I should have been. I will always feel bad about that.

See you next week To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the great achievements of the future